I Don’t Want You to Die, Mommie!

May 24, 2012 By Leave a Comment

“Mommie, I don’t want you to die!”

That is what I woke up to this morning.  It was 6:05a and Pie*, my almost 4 year old was standing by my bed with quivering lips.  “Mommie, I would miss you so much.  Please don’t die.”  I pulled her up on the bed.  “What are you talking about, Sweetheart?  Did you have a bad dream?”

“I’d miss you so much.  I don’t want you to die.”  She put her still warm hands on my cheeks, her face was close enough to Eskimo kiss.  Her eyes were full of tears.

I started to tell her that I wasn’t going to die today.  I’m perfectly healthy, nothing remotely indicating that I’m anywhere near death.  Then I remembered the Bible study I’ve been doing for 7 weeks, Beth Moore’s Mercy Triumphs on the Book of James. (Absolutely amazing.  If you have the chance, do it!)

James 4:14-15 says, “ …whereas you do not know what will happen tomorrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapor that appears for a little time and then vanishes away. Instead you ought to say, If the Lord wills, we shall live and do this or that.’”  Even at 6:10a, I managed to have a shred of discernment and stopped myself from promising not to die today.

”I don’t think I’m going to die today, sweetheart.  But that doesn’t matter.  The great news is because we both love Jesus we will be together forever in heaven.  Forever.”

“I’m really going to miss you, Mommie.”

“We’re going to be together forever, my love.”

I held her precious warm body close to mine.  The truth is I didn’t know what would happen today.  Only God knew.

But it was a great reminder.

I didn’t mind the mess in the kitchen today.  I didn’t rush upstairs to workout but instead read to the girls and cuddled them close.  Instead of looking past them to concentrate on everything that I “had” to do, I looked past what I “had” to do and concentrated on the girls.

No, I didn’t think I was going to die today.  But it was a wonderful lesson to treasure the moments I would have otherwise let pass by.  We’re not promised time, but we have an opportunity to embrace and treasure the our families now.

I’m going to go kiss my babies…now.

 

We’ll be back to The Mommie Commandments next week. This was just too good to pass up.

* I keep my children’s names private. On the blog, I refer to my 5 ½ yr old as Boo and my almost 4 yr old as Pie.

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Filed Under: Mommie Help, Priorities, Stress, Uncategorized Tagged With: , , , , ,

No Complaining About My Weeds: MC#6

May 8, 2012 By 4 Comments

My to-do list is full.  What about yours?  Laundry, grocery shopping, finish sorting and re-organizing the girl’s closets.  Add my closet to the list.  Plan a rough summer schedule.  Don’t forget standing appointments; get the girls haircuts, and a couple play dates.  Of course, the cleaning still needs to get done.  And cooking.  Then I hear a sweet little voice.

“Mommie, can you come play princess with us?”  “Sweetheart, let me get this load of laundry out and start dinner.  Then I’ll come in.”  A few silent seconds go by.  Then I hear a disheartened, “Ok.”  My heart sinks.

Then I get a little peeved.  I have so much to do.  I mean, really.  I’m not being obsessive-compulsive about the house.  At least I don’t think so.   The kids have to be fed.  And someone has to do the laundry.  Mommies, we have a lot on our plate!

If I’m honest with myself, sometimes spending time with the girls feels like something I have to check off my list.  Ugh.  I hate that.  I really hope they don’t notice.  Double Ugh.

When my husband spends time with the girls, they laugh and have a ball.  I have to ask myself, “How often do I laugh with my kids?  Why don’t I laugh with them?”  James often works long hours.  Many times he comes home after the girls are asleep.  He treasures his time with the girls because it’s limited.

Sure, he has things to do at home too. He takes care of our finances, insurance, etc.  The lawn is also his domain.  Not that he loves it.  It’s not fun for him, just a responsibility that he willingly takes on. But he’s clear that first things come first. The girls come before the lawn.

I love to watch them play.  He’s such a great dad. They laugh, and I mean belly laugh, when they’re together.  The girls always ask for Daddy dates.  How that makes my heart soar.  Why, because he makes it a point to enjoy them.

When I step back and think about it, I want that too.  I want to enjoy my kids.  I don’t want to be consumed with my to-do list.  They are not one of my chores.  They are precious treasures the Lord has allowed me to shepherd for a few short years.  Truth be told, my time with them is limited as well.

It’s just a decision I have to make.  It’s time to enjoy my kids.  That doesn’t mean I stop cooking or doing the laundry. But maybe we have leftovers or sandwiches because we were playing princess and I forgot about the time.  Or maybe the laundry can wait to be folded until they go to bed so we can talk a walk, go on a scavenger hunt or read together.  If I’m going to live by my priorities, if first things really do come first, it’s time to enjoy my kids.  Sorry if there are too many weeds in my yard.

 Mommie Commandment #6

You Shall Enjoy Your Children

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Filed Under: Intentional Living, Mommie Commandments, Mommie Guilt, Time Management Tagged With: , , ,

Whine-Cry-Manipulation: MC#5

May 1, 2012 By 1 Comment

“I wish I could have her Lalaloopsy,” my daughter cried.  Actually, it was more like a whine-cry-manipulation.  Anyone else know that voice?  “Honey, you are so blessed.  Look at what God has given you.  You have so many toys.  Some children don’t have toys.  Are you thankful for what you have? God wants us to be thankful and then, His word says we’ll shine like stars.  Isn’t that awesome?”  “Mama, can I get a Lalaloopsy for my birthday?  When is my birthday?”  So much for the teaching moment.

That whine-cry-manipulation can drive me batty.  I despise it. I’m amazed at what brings it on.  Someone else’s toy, an outfit, something she saw on TV.  Wait a minute.  Am I talking about my daughter or me?

If I’m honest with myself, I use that same whine-cry-manipulation with God.  It may not be out of my mouth (if it’s a good day), but it may go through my head. “When will I get to the next stage?  How come she gets to do that?  Why don’t they have to worry about money?  Why wasn’t I born with that?”  Ughh….   Let’s face it.  Complaining stinks.  My daughter isn’t the only one that needs an attitude adjustment.

1 Timothy 6:6 says, “Now godliness with contentment is great gain.”  Why?  Because contentment signifies trust in God. I’m not talking about resignation to poor choices, circumstances or living a mediocre life. I’m talking about trusting God in the now while you reach for the more.  Cultivating thankfulness as an act of worship, instead of whining and complaining over what you don’t have.

Paul summed it up in Philippians 2:14-15. “Do all things without complaining and disputing, that you may become blameless and harmless, children of God without fault in the midst of a crooked and perverse generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world.”

My advice was right.  It’s time I take it. I want to shine.

Mommie Commandment #5

You shall not covet other mommie’s figure, stroller, or stuff.

O Lord, You are the portion of my inheritance and my cup; You maintain my lot.  The lines have fallen to me in pleasant places;
Yes, I have a good inheritance.  Psalm 16:6

 

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Filed Under: Emotions, Mommie Commandments, Mommie Help, Uncategorized Tagged With: ,

No Thanks for Oatmeal

March 23, 2012 By Leave a Comment

Do you ever feel like you are doing same things, over and over, hardly noticed, hardly appreciated?  Endless loads of laundry (how much laundry can little people make?), meals cooked, rugs vacuumed, sippy cups refilled, diapers changed, kids chauffeured around all day long…

I’ve realized I can do just about anything if I’m thanked and appreciated.  I love encouragement. I love to give it and receive it.  Words of encouragement are one of my top love languages.  The little girl in me wants to be told I’m doing a great job.

That’s one of the challenges of mommiehood – most of what I do is hidden or not recognized.  When was the last time I was thanked for changing the third poop of the day or giving kids another bath?  What about the time spent nursing and pumping? Or thinking, planning, making a healthy meal? The kids don’t run up to me and say, “Thanks so much for making healthy oatmeal for me this morning, Mom.  You do such a good job of making sure I get the vitamins and nutrients I need.”  Not so much.  It’s more like this: “I don’t want oatmeal! I want Fruit Loops!”

Likewise, many husbands don’t get it.  “What did you do today?  You got together with Nicole, what did you talk about?”  They don’t exactly realize what we’re busy or consumed with during the day besides being with the kids.  I love my husband dearly, but most of the time he doesn’t notice the vacuumed rug or the clean socks in his drawer every week. (To be fair, I don’t notice the bills paid on time each week and the gutters cleaned each season.   I don’t run to him saying, “Thanks for going to work each day, honey.”  Maybe it’s time to start.)

I thrive on encouragement and there is little of it when you are a mom.  But there is One who notices, Mommie. And if I take time to listen, He is encouraging me, cheering me and loving me in the doing. Read His words with me:

“Trust in the Lord and do good.” Mommie, you are doing good! Keep taking great care of your family!  (Psalm 37:3a)

“Dwell in the land and feed on His faithfulness.”  I am faithful to you, Mommie. You are being faithful in the doing: laundry, picking up toys and dishes.  Know that you will be rewarded (Psalm 37:3b, Galatians 5:7).

“Well done, good and faithful servant; you were faithful over a few things.  I will make you ruler over many things.  Enter into the joy of your Lord.”  (Matthew 25:20)

Can you hear Him, Mommie?  “Well done, Mommie. I see you and everything you do – from driving carpools to wiping behinds.  You are being faithful.  You are doing good, not just for your family, but for Me.  I love you.”

I love you, too Lord.  Thanks.  I needed that.

 

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Filed Under: Mommie Jobs, Mommie Strength, Routines Tagged With: , , , ,
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